Psalm 42:1-3
As the hart panteth after the water brooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God.
2 My soul thirsteth for God, for the living God: when shall I come and appear before God?
3 My tears have been my meat day and night, while they continually say unto me, Where is thy God?
KJV
A few weeks ago, the news was peppered with stories regarding Mother Theresa and her crisis of faith. In short, she spent many years of her life and ministry wondering if a) God had any idea if what she was doing and b) if her sacrifices were really making a difference. There have been two primary reactions to this story. The first, from those who do not regard or understand things of faith, is to project a “see I told you so” attitude and note that this good woman did have a few lucid moments when she questioned the existence of God and good for her. The Bible refers to this type as scoffers and mockers and there’s not much I can add to this.
The second reaction (and candidly, the one I had) was “oh thank God, someone else feels this way”. Now dear reader, you may be one of those folks who constantly live in victory and, if so, please go look at the lovely pictures in my photo stream on the right. For the rest of you, I’m guessing you’ve struggled with doubt from time to time (or may be battling it now). This post is for you.
I do a lot of driving; let’s call it going on journeys. Sometimes the road is flat and I can see for miles ahead what is coming. Other times, there are curves, twists and turns, and I have to trust that the road will take me where I need to go, even if I can’t see my destination. I remember driving home from General Conference this year and taking the direction that the good folks at Google provided. They took me off the interstate somewhere in northern Florida and candidly, I felt lost for a couple of hours along that journey. Did I pull the car over and stop going? Not at all. What I did do was trust in the instructions I had in spite of my second thoughts and lo and behold, I am back in Mount Vernon. Don’t you wish all of life was that easy?
My point is that everyone at some point in their journey is going to experience doubt and that is not a bad thing. Recognize it for what it is; address it but for heaven’s sake don’t stop. Just trust that your directions will keep you pointed in the right direction.
Right now, I’m on this cusp of something new and different. I am scared? A little. Do I have doubt? More than a little. I am watching Reg as he starts his journey and Gene as he progresses in his journey and I realize that even though I have doubt I can follow and be okay. Even with a little doubt.
Mark 9:23-24
23 Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth.
24 And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe ; help thou mine unbelief.
KJV